Sometimes this business drives me insane. I have a permanent lump on my skull from slamming my head into the wall. It’s frustrating as hell sometimes.
Recently we’ve seen a rash of”¦. well”¦ ”˜ridiculous practices’ is the cleanest way I can put it, from some home sellers and their agents.
I’m going on the assumption here that if you have your home listed for sale in the Multiple Listing Service that you, you know, want to sell your home. Maybe this premise isn’t correct. But generally speaking one would think that if a home is listed for sale then the owner wants to sell it.
Crazy home seller. Case #1
It’s the day of closing. Your house has been on the market for months on end. You finally have a buyer who wants to buy your home. This desire is evidenced by all the crap the buyers lender has flung at them being fended off piece by piece. The buyer has already paid for an inspection and appraisal. They have in fact, ALREADY SIGNED THE DOCUMENTS. Closing ”“ the official moment in time when the county records the deed ”“ is scheduled for 4:00pm.
And at 2:00pm, you the seller pitch a fit and demand more money because the transaction closed eight days later than originally planned. You the seller are fully aware that the delay is due to the lender, and the buyer has bent over backwards to get everything done. But you the seller decide “it’s not fair” and the delayed closing is going to cost you some extra money.
Okfine. I fully understand that a seller wants to squeeze every possible dime out of the sale of their home. But in this case, you own the home free and clear. In two hours you are going to get a check for $189,000. That’s a pretty decent chunk of change, and well over what you paid for the home several years ago. You done good.
Now, two hours prior to close, you ask the buyer to cover the HOA fees you’ve incurred for the past 8 days the closing was delayed.
So you ask them for another $42.
Forty. Two. Dollars.
Apparently, you’re willing to jeopardize the entire transaction because you want a check for $189,042 not $189,000. You are made aware that the bank will need to re-draw docs *if* the buyer agrees to this. Recall this is the same idiot lender that caused the eight day delay in the first place.
The buyer is **this close** (I’m holding my fingers about a quarter inch apart, you’ll have to visualize here) to saying “Eff it, we’ll find another place”. Hell, I *want* them to say eff it. But that would probably be almost as idiotic as asking for another $42 in the first place. So we have the title company deduct the 42 bucks from our commission to avoid going back to the incompetent lender for another round of “please kill me now”.
Crazy listing agent. Case #2
Yesterday, I get a call from a writer for a regional tri-state publication of Golf Magazine. Seems she is penning an article for a local golf course community and wants to feature a home for sale in her article. Unfortunately, we aren’t currently carrying a listing in that particular subdivision, so I tell the deadline crunched writer I’ll contact some agents that do, and have them contact her.
I mean who in their right mind wouldn’t want to have one of their golf course home listings featured in a magazine that will go out to who knows how many potential buyers that are obviously interested in golf? FOR FREE!
So I contact an agent and the conversation goes like this:
Me: “I have contact info for a Golf Magazine that would like to feature a home in XXXX. Your listing seems perfect. It won’t cost you anything but a five minute phone call and emailing in a photo or two.”
Crazy Listing Agent: “That sounds like a lot of hassle.”
Me (after a moment of dumbfounded silence): “Uhm. OK. Really?”
Crazy Listing Agent: “Yeah, I just don’t have time for something like that.”
What. Ever. Oh how I’d love to call the sellers of the property and say, “Thought you might like to know your agent turned down an opportunity to showcase your home in a regional edition of Golf Magazine. Apparently he’s so busy that he doesn’t have time for a killer marketing opportunity to help sell your home that’s been on the market for months.”
I wonder how the home seller would feel about that.
Crazy investor/owner. Case #3
Submitted an offer for a buyer ”“ at full listing price.
The seller, an “investor”, countered ”“ wanting twice the earnest money (and making it non-refundable for ANY reason) and increasing the price by $5K.
Excuse me? You just got a FULL PRICE OFFER from a rock solid buyer. Now is not the time to be greedy. Or stupid. You listed the home at X dollars. Not X + $5K. If $X isn’t good enough, change the listing price.
Do you think the buyer is just going to roll over and say, “oh well, what’s another five grand. And who cares if our earnest money isn’t refundable for things like the seller not being able to produce a clear title or if the home doesn’t appraise.”
Think again Buckwheat. Our buyers aren’t stupid. Our buyers know damn well there are hundreds of other homes for sale that more than meet their need and where they won’t have to put up with a “savvy investor” that thinks they can just stick it to them.
Your counter offer was just declined. Good luck finding another buyer.
To be blunt, if you want to sell your home, don’t do moronic things to jeopardize the sale. *Think* about the potential ramifications of your interactions with buyers. Thoroughly vet your choice of listing agent. No, you don’t have to, and shouldn’t, just bow to every whim of the potential buyer. But for the love of fluffy bunnies, and my sanity and aching skull, please evaluate your demands before committing them to paper.